Time to look on the lighter side of fantasy baseball! While everyone's evaluating proven draft strategies (our own review will be forthcoming), I thought it prudent to direct fantasy managers away from the concepts that don't quite work.
The Lou "I Need Left-Handed Bats" Piniella Strategy: Every batter on your team has to be a lefty, and every pitcher has to be a southpaw. If you're pure at heart, you'll even reject the switch hitters.
The Yankee Strategy: You only take the biggest contracts available. Sounded like a good idea, until you realize you ended up with Barry Zito, Mike Hampton, and Carl Pavano as your aces...
The Vegetarian Strategy: Inspired by Prince Fielder, you only take the veggie lovers. (Can you even fill out a roster this way? Fielder might count for two or three slots...)
The "Early Bird Catches the Worm" Strategy: With all the rookie hype, you only draft prospects and wait for it to pay off. And wait. And wait...
The Popeye Strategy: Taking a page from the well-known cartoon character, you only draft players who have abnormally sized body parts, or are abnormally tall or short. Guys to fill your team include Barry Bonds and his huge head, tiny David Eckstein, and the ridiculously tall duo of Randy Johnson and Jon Rauch.
The "Spooneybarger All-Stars" Strategy: Only the goofiest names for your team! Laugh to yourself as other managers try to say your roster with a straight face. Other players include Boof Bonser, Coco Crisp, and Terry Tiffee
The "Anagram Team" Strategy: Did you know that Albert Pujols can be rearranged to "J's Pout Label" or "Super Tall Job"? How about Ian Kinsler: "Slink a Rein" or "Risk Ale Inn." And Ryan Braun should use his anagram as his nickname: "Runny Arab." I doubt Derek Jeter will want to use "Jerked tree" as his nickname.
I think we'll stop there. Any other ones you want added, post it in the comment section!
4 comments:
WAAAAAAY too much time on your hands at work there, Kevin! =P Jerked Tree was the best one.
I used to play that the last round of any draft was a "Spooneybarger" round. I remember when I first looked for some random name and came across his. I really wish he still played baseball; he'd be on my every team!
Excellent post. Sad part is, there is actually someone in our league who uses the Yankee Strategy.
Last year 12 teams, he drafted 7 Yankees. This year I think the over/under is 9.
People who roster an entire Professional team annoy me... Especially when they roster the wrong people, at least in my opinion. This is 2 years removed, but why on Earth would anyone draft (in the following order) Pujols, then David Eckstein, THEN Scott Rolen? This was, I believe, within the first 5 rounds of the draft... I really don't get it. I like having at least one Cubbie on my team, but I do my best to not draft them out of order. If I have to, I throw my last pick in their direction (Mike Fontenot is my fallback this year).
Hahahahaha...this is too good. Love the "Popeye Strategy"...I'd love to see a team picture of that, haha.
Did any of you guys hear about Schlotzsky's contest? They're giving away fantasy baseball teams from SimDynasty.com, a grand prize trip to St. Louis Missouri in July and other baseball stuff. One of the first times I've seen fantasy teams as a prize...contest runs until 5/31/09; check it out at www.bigleagueclubz.com. (Warning: there is a highly addictive game on the site)
I'm going to go put together my veggie roster now.
-Sam
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